Farewell
by aphelion-orion
Summary: Claude gets the chance to return home. [sadness and happiness in equal parts, shounen ai, DiasxClaude]


**Title:** Farewell  
**Fandom:** Star Ocean 2  
**Pairing:** You know which one. ;P  
**Rating:** PG  
**Warnings:** Umm, sadness. Kissy-ness. Fluffiness.  
**Disclaimer:** Don't own.  
**Notes:** Many thanks to **maiji**, for being an endless source of inspiration. This was written as a sort of "what would happen if Claude got the chance to go home?" thing. Note that I haven't played BlueSphere, but from what I've been told, it's best to disregard it anyway. XD

-

**Farewell**

**- **

It had been three years.

Strange to think that it had only been three years. It had felt more like a lifetime to him, a strange, exhilarating, not quite comfortable lifetime. And some time between skinning rabbits for dinner, killing bandits, cracking stupid jokes and laughing at Dias when he woke up rumpled and disgruntled and crying into Dias' shirt over something more or less stupid, he had realized what he had known for a long time, that if something, anything were to happen, he would miss Dias terribly.

Of course, way back then, he had thought that the something would be due to Dias' recklessness and boundless self-confidence (or overconfidence, as he sometimes feared), but not this.

"This is Federation vessel D-77413-6C Valiant. We have come in peace. We request permission to explore your planet and exchange technology."

Never, not in a million years, this.

They had not really talked about it. Dias could have demanded all sorts of things, least of all an explanation, but he did not demand. He never asked anything Claude couldn't give.

"You want to do this." Not a question. Dias knew him too well for questions. It had been three years, after all.

"She is my mother, Dias." Not really an explanation. But they had both come to be satisfied with these kinds of things. He didn't know how to explain the pull towards a home that had, up until then, only existed in his memory.

They had made their way to Lacour, where the latest explorer crew had been said to have landed, to further the friendly relationship between Expel and Earth. If his laugh had been a bit strained and Dias' eyes had misted over with a gentler sheen on the way there, neither of them said anything.

The crew members had been surprised and a bit pleased to see one of their own, and listened with wide eyes as he related the struggle, which had ultimately led to the Calnus' and Nede's demise. They welcomed him on board with a detached ease he had not known for three years. Been there, done that, seen everything. The Federation's unofficial philosophy. Picked up a presumed-dead Ensign, all in a day's work.

They gave him a new set of clothes - an Ensign's uniform, how fitting - and were astonished when he thanked them, but refused to change into the clothes immediately. There was a familiar undercurrent of contempt for this planet's technically underdeveloped civilization that was palpable even to Dias, if his unwavering frown and refusal to let them talk "in private" was any indication.

The ship would leave in the morning.

Dias said nothing when Claude declined to spend the night with his newfound comrades and instead went to the local inn. Dias didn't say anything when Claude picked a single room despite the fact that there were others available, either.

They spent the rest of the evening in silence, though it was not the easy silence they remembered. Claude had to catch himself more than once to not blurt any of his thoughts, or, heaven forbid, an apology, because that was the last thing that Dias would have wanted. By the time the lights were out and they were squeezed together on the narrow bed with the itchy blanket, the words felt ready to burst out of his mouth regardless.

"I need to be selfish now." The words rang strangely hollow in their small room, and he wondered if it was the fault of the knot sitting at the back of his throat.

"That's a first," came the reply, neither sarcastic nor unkind, just genuinely surprised. As if he weren't being selfish doing what he intended to do.

"I... I want to say goodbye tonight."

Silence.

"We're leaving early tomorrow and... no, that's an excuse." He shook his head into the pillow. "I just hate long goodbyes."

More silence, then, "I hate goodbyes in general."

He couldn't help but laugh softly, then, at the petulance resonating in the deep voice. "Me too. Me too."

Another bout of silence, during which he had to fight down the knot in his throat, threatening to steal his voice away. "I have to be selfish again," he finally confessed.

A soft rustling of hair on sheets that indicated a nod.

Claude bit his lip, debated one last time whether or not he should really to do this, then bridged the gap between them and kissed Dias.

Or tried to, really. It took him two tries to find Dias' lips in the darkness, and at any other time, he would have paused to die of embarrassment, but the third try brought him to his goal, and after that it was... warm. Softness mixed with dry roughness. It wasn't even that much of a kiss, more a touching of lips than anything else, and Dias didn't do anything to kill him, so Claude decided that maybe he was safe enough to be bold and let his tongue slip out for just a second to touch his upper lip, tasting salt and water and _Dias_. It only lasted for a second before he broke the kiss, pulling back and turning onto his other side, his back to his companion. He did not want to guess what kind of expression was waiting for him in the darkness.

"I'm sorry."

The reply did not come, but after a while, when he was just on the verge of sleep, he thought he heard a soft, "Don't be," murmured at him.

---

Getting up and ready in the morning while Dias pretended to be asleep was one of the hardest things he had ever done. Exchanging his well-worn linen tunic for the cool, soft efficiency of artificial fabric felt strange, and he did not find it in his heart to abandon them, so he stuffed his old clothes into his traveling bag, down at the very bottom.

Walking through the still empty pre-dawn streets towards the shuttle's landing spot, he felt as if he should have been saying goodbye to the familiar stone towers of Lacour castle, or the smaller brick houses lining the street, or even the lush green plains beyond the gate - a nod from a castle guard as he passed through - but all he could really concentrate on was the growing pull that had, over the course of the last night, grown into a second direction. One that led home, the other back to the man still pretending to be asleep in the Lacour inn's single room.

A fresh wind picked up as he walked across the plain towards the dully gleaming bulk of the shuttle, whipping his hair and the grass about. One of the crewmembers - Vinnie? Vinyar? - waved briefly to him and climbed aboard, leaving Claude one last moment alone to look back.

He did not turn around, though. He didn't dare. He just stood there for a while, hands balled into fists and willing himself to take the last two steps forward, onto the shuttle's ramp. He swallowed.

"Hey," said a deep, beloved voice behind him. "I thought you hated long goodbyes."

He whirled around. Dias was standing there, the wind tugging at his hair and cloak, and looking as though it was pure coincidence that he was here. Claude's first thought was that Dias had not respected his wish. His second thought was that he felt glad for it. Leaving seemed easier now.

Feeling the tears prick at the corners of his eyes, he forced out a small chuckle. "I thought you hated goodbyes in general."

Dias snorted, brushing a wayward strand behind his ear and walking the last few steps towards him. "I'm not here for a goodbye."

Claude felt as though a brick wall had suddenly collapsed on top of his head. "But I... you... we..."

A crewmember stuck his head out of the hatch and blinked in confusion when he saw the long-lost ensign once more engrossed in conversation with the unfriendly intimidating man from yesterday. Dias glared him into submission, before giving the still-stuttering young man at his side a gentle nudge towards the ramp.

"You wanted to go. So let's go."

------

**A/N:** And they lived happily ever after, screwing like bunnies on the whole way back to Earth, and traumatizing poor Vinnie? Vinyar? the crewman, because he was not a yaoi fan (stupid man, that's him).

Other than that, the author would like to note that she detests sad endings and likes fluff. So you get warm fuzzies. Hehehe, like Dias would let Claude leave, the poor, confused cutie. XD

C&C is much appreciated, by the way. ;)


End file.
